


Ashy Frost

by Guess_This_Guest



Category: Frozen (Disney Movies)
Genre: F/M, Hans Has Fire Powers (Disney), Romance, Short Chapters, Suicide Attempt, helsa
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-11-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:07:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 4,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25284385
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Guess_This_Guest/pseuds/Guess_This_Guest
Summary: simply transferring all of my works from ff.net to a03Summary: Her hair is turning black, her personality is growing colder and she doesn't know why. Hans is back and he is the key to stop her coldness.
Relationships: Anna/Kristoff (Disney), Elsa/Hans (Disney)
Kudos: 11





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> as in the summary, I'm transferring all of my stories from fanfiction.net to a03, cuz why not?
> 
> I already have 10 chapters written for this fanfic. I'll upload two chapters per week up til where I left off. 
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

(Present)

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"Where are you going?" Anna demands her sister as Elsa hoist herself onto her horse, Frostbite. Elsa makes an attempt to pretend that Anna isn't there, but Anna has been desperate just to _talk_ to her. "Elsa!"

The Queen looks down at her sister, recognizing the fear, curiosity, and confusion in her blue orbs. For some unknown reason, like many times before, Elsa doesn't care. It's just the odd coldness she feels. Not _temperature_ coldness but _emptiness_ coldness. "Anna." Even her voice had become dull and cold.

"For the past months, you've been disappearing around this time and returning before dinner," Anna says.

"Is that not an acceptable time?" Elsa asks, coldly. "Do you want me to return _after_ dinner?" Because she can. She is Queen. The Ice Queen. She does what she wants.

Elsa sees the hurt in Anna's eyes, but do not regret her words. Anna grasps the hem of her sister's navy dress. "Elsa, I'm worried. This isn't you."

_You don't know me,_ Elsa thinks. _No one does._

"You've gotten cold," Anna says.

_You don't know cold._

"Is there something wrong? I can help or we can go to the trolls-"

"Anna," Elsa tries to interrupt but her sister continues.

"-and they can figure out what's wrong. Maybe you're just sick. Do you feel ill? Is there a doctor you're going to? Where are you going?"

"My whereabouts aren't your concerns."

"But I'm worried. You don't take an escort or a guard. Kristoff noticed too. He's worried and Olaf... even the staffs are too!"

Elsa suddenly has the urge to freeze Anna where she stands. She's wasting her time. "Then assure them I will return an hour before dinner. Now if you can, get out of my way. Please." The 'please' isn't meant for the kindness. It hints as a warning.

Anna reluctantly released her grip and Elsa waste no more seconds of commanding her horse to speed off, with a kick of her heeled boots.

The wind whips through her long half white, half black hair as Elsa commands Frostbite to pick up the speed. At this rate of their speed, you'll guess that the designation matters of a loved one. But it's not. This designation matters of her sanity.

The Everlasting Winter Forest is far from Arendelle, behind the mountains where her ice castle (still) stands. A forest of eternal winter, forbidden to everyone but herself and another. Anyone caught there, in her winter wonderland, would be frozen on sight. No. She hasn't frozen anyone... yet. She had an urge to freeze Anna. This isn't the first urge. She did it before but it was misshapen. But now, she wants to _purposely_ freeze her. Her own _sister._ Anna just doesn't understand the pain inside Elsa. Sure she can be worried and concerned about Elsa. There are qualms about that. However, what is it can Anna do if Elsa is in real danger? Protect her? Elsa sneers at that thought. Anna can't even protect herself, let alone a queen. Anna's choices can be very poor. Her demands for that immediate engagement was the spark of the previous eternal winter in Arendelle. All because of her sister's stupid choices...

Elsa slows her horse. Here she goes again with the cold, heartless thoughts about her sister. She doesn't know why she acts so cold towards Anna and everyone who makes contact with her. Elsa blames it on the black hair.


	2. Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tags said very short chapters, lol, here's an example

(Past)

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It was only six months ago when she found a tendril of black hair near her nape, right after Kristoff proposed to Anna, which was a month after that curse. It bothered her at the beginning. She tried everything to get rid of it. She tried to cut it away, but the scissors split at the first snip. So she tried a metal dagger and then an ice dagger, which the black hair chipped both blades. Elsa even went to the extreme and used fire, only to find out that, indeed, the black hair was indestructible. Fortunately, she later discovered she can hide it with her braid.

But as the days grew, more small patches of what was white hair that had turned black were found. Her coldness flourished. Snapping at anyone, spitting harsh sarcastic remarks and making slight threats of harsh punishments should not things goes her way and more. Kristoff and Anna married a month after the discovery of the black hair. Elsa accepted her coldness. She knew what she was doing. Yet she didn't care. And in eight months' time, Elsa now has one half of her hair black and the other half blond white.

Anna, Kristoff, and Olaf had questioned about her hair, before, Elsa simply told them she has gained better control of her powers and it shows in her appearance. She supposed they bought her little lie because they haven't brought it up again. Truth is, Elsa doesn't know what the black hair means.


	3. Three

(Present)

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Frostbite comes to a stop at the treeline of the forest. Elsa knows that the horse doesn't like the Everlasting Winter forest. She doesn't mind the absence of her horse. She will soon have another company.

She climbs down the horse and pats his side. "Stay here."

Pass the treeline, is snow instead of the green grass. A wintry wonderland that seems to stretch on and on. In Arendelle is summer. Of course, Elsa dislikes summer. It itches her skin. If anything she wants to curse her kingdom again— the only difference is, it wouldn't be an accident.

Elsa pulls off the hood of her black cloak. No need for it. She's practically immune to the cold. She steps into her forest and begins to look for _him._

This place holds her sanity. Here, she can do anything. Scream, cry, yell, laugh, lose control of her powers or simply sit and do nothing. She clamps her hands on either side of her head. "What is _wrong_ with me?" she shouts. "I didn't mean. I swear! I can't control it!"

"So our lessons aren't successful?" comes a voice. He always finds her before she finds him.

Elsa clasps her hands in front of her and frowns at Hans. " Our lessons are sufficient..."

"So what troubles you, your highness?"

She runs a hand in her hair. "I thought I clarified not to call me that."

Hans step in front of her. He was dressed in his usual attire; his hunting attire, which is a heavy black cloak, thick dark blue pants, thick brown hunting boots, and white leather gloves. He has his quiver slung over his shoulder and his big wooden bow in hand. "It's a title you should take gratitude of," Hans says. "Now what troubles you, my Queen... besides your ink-black hair."

She smirks. "I'd thought you'd like it."

His expression is blank. "It's unique."

Elsa rolls her eyes and begins to walk, with Hans following her. She shares her emotions. How she was beginning to feel cold after discovering the black tendril of hair. Hans listens, as always, even if this isn't the first time hearing about how she found out about the hair. Elsa knows she would get prejudiced comments should anyone know about the newfound friendship with the man who tried to kill her and her sister. But you can't always judge a book by its cover.


	4. Four

Hans laughed. "Oh, please! Please tell me that you intend to kill me!" Fire encircled his fists, blazing threats and danger.

"I will you kill you, Hans," Elsa said, readying herself by creating flurries of snow around her hands.

"All right. Just one question: which is more hazardous? Fire or snow?" Hans asked.

It was then Elsa realized that Hans has an ability similar to hers, just a very different element. It was then when she realized who she was going against. Elsa remembered that she still doesn't have complete control of her powers... no doubt Hans does. His attitude and confidence showed it all.

"It would be an ongoing battle if we were to find out," Elsa noted, stopping her flurries. It's true. Heat/fire vs cold/snow/ice. Both elements can battle each other out until one becomes tired. And that winner is inconclusive.

"Agreed," Hans said casting off his fire.

"Perhaps we met on the wrong foot," she said. "...I am Elsa, Queen of Arendelle."

A moment passed. Hans blinked. Then took a step and bowed. "I am Hans."

What? No Prince Hans? "Just Hans?" Then she noticed his clothing. It didn't scream, _Hey, I'm a royal! So kneel and respect me._ It said more like, _I'm a peaceful hunter unless you step into my territory._ He still looks much the same, if not, his cheeks gotten more flusher, his hair longer and redder and green eyes bright and alert.

"Just Hans, your majesty," Hans confirmed.

"Okay, 'Just Hans', tell me why you are in my forbidden forest?"

"Hunting. Training. It's peaceful here, wouldn't you agree?" Hans said. Of course, she would. It's her escape place. "If you don't mind answering, why are you here, alone, without a guard in presence?"

"I'll have you know, I am fully capable of protecting myself." Elsa retorted. "And besides, another presence will ruin the peace. I- I demand an explanation of your fire powers."

Hans looked at his hands. "I'll tell you everything— if you tell me everything."

That was the start of their friendship. A start Elsa never regrets. She found out so much of the man. His past, how he was being ignored because he was the thirteenth son. Despite their friendship, she never learnt why he had to target Arendelle's throne, nor wanted to learn. Elsa hasn't forgiven him but she decided to forget it. Anna did and it seems to be better that way. She learnt about his power (inborn with such a blessing but a curse. Just like her), and what he did after he was presumed dead. Elsa in exchange told him what happened to her kingdom after it was unfrozen.

She didn't expect his next visit. Or the following visits. He always found her first. She didn't complain or question. She told herself that she didn't care. As the days progress, so did their friendship. Elsa discovered he was sarcastic, funny, sweet... and she hates to admit, but it's true, Elsa finds Hans very very attractive. She sometimes loses herself in those green vibrant eyes, her fingers itch to touch his sideburns, to run her fingers through his fiery red hair.

She only got two and a half of her wishes. After he showed her where he lived. A large cabin outside but near the Everlasting Winter forest. The sight of it just makes her feel warm, cozy and sleepy. They had a small lunch there when Hans wanted to tell her a secret. "I have trouble sleeping ever since your sister knocked me off that boat— or was it a ship?" They were on a carpet. He was leaned back, perched on his elbow, eating a cheese bun.

"I don't remember," Elsa said. She was sitting close to him, drinking tea that he kindy heated for her. "Would you like me to knock you out? I guarantee it will be the best sleep you ever had in years. Just a quick hit on the head."

"I am honored by the offer, my Queen— but I wouldn't want a migraine waking up."

Elsa grinned. He tells her everything, but, "Why are you telling me this? Now?"

He paused to think. "The fire still burns."

Elsa squinted at him. She didn't understand what he meant by that. He didn't have dark circles under his eyes. But she can see the struggle of sleep. She can help him. He is her friend. Her voice was quiet. "Do you want to go to sleep?"

"I can't—"

"But do you _want_ to?"

Hans stared at her, slowing frowning. Maybe she asked too coldly because he said, "Don't you dare punch me. It would be even more embarrassing to get knocked out a royal girl. Twice."

Elsa leaned closer to his face. She bore her eyes into his curious eyes. She smirked and blew a thin icy cloud into his face. Hans blinked, then smiled. "I don't think cold air can help me fall asleep, my Queen."

" _Really_?"

He giggled. "Yes, _really_ —" His body dropped like dead weight and a snore tore from his nose. Elsa smiled. She didn't want to appear intrusive or rude, but she later decided she didn't care. She ran a finger down his sideburns. One wish. Then her fingers in his hair. Second wish. She was reluctant but her curiosity bests her reluctance; she planted a kiss on his cheek before realizing the absurdity. She picked up a discarded book. That was half the third wish. She wondered how his lips feel against hers.

When he woke up, he thanks her. Too many times. It was starting to get annoying to the point she blasted him with a gust of thick snow. A week later, Hans started to give Elsa lessons to help her have better control of her powers. Each lesson was helpful and efficient. She one time froze and unfroze him in less than ten seconds. And then there were the friendly spars. This is proof that he trust her, even after occasion times she would 'blank out' and harm him. He would shrug it off when she was aware of her surrounding. After each lesson, black-out, and spar, Elsa felt herself trusting him with her life. If Hans can trust her with his life, why can't she trust him with her own?

It seemed, here in Everlasting Winter forest she wasn't cold. His fiery presence can warm her heart and she would forget that she is a queen. That she has a duty. She would forget her black hair and how it affected her personality.

Because here, with Hans, the man whose slowly redeeming himself, makes Elsa happy.


	5. Chapter 5

(Present)

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"Do you think it's your black hair that's causing you to become so cold? Or is it just an effect?"

"I don't know. I can't cut it." Elsa said. There's a look in his eyes, and Elsa frowns. She dismisses his suggestion before he has the chance to depart his lips. "—No. I've already tried to burn it away." He gives her a pouted expression. Elsa bites her bottom lip. "You _really_ don't like it?"

"It's _really_ unique."

"But you said that the last time—"

"I can't quite describe it, Queen Elsa. It's _really_ lovely if that's what you want to hear." Hans says, offering a smile.

Elsa smirks. "I _really_ want to spar," she challenges, getting into and fighting stance. Flurries of snow spin around her feet.

"Okay." Hans gets into his fighting stance. His hair comes to life and dance like dancing flames. It's one of the things Elsa finds inevitably attractive. If she wasn't a queen without class, she might've drooled icicles. "But no cheating like the last time."

Elsa sneers. "Oh please. How was _I_ cheating?"

"Hmmm, allow me to recall." Hans throws a number of fireballs. "You turned the ground to slippery ice."

Elsa's own thick snowballs collide into the fireballs, dissolving them in the air. "I'm sorry, but I can't hear you over the sound of my incoming victory!"

"Oh _really_?" Hans smirks.

" _Really_. Perhaps you should come closer to my hearing range."

"Perhaps I should."

Hans lunge towards her. But Elsa stomps her right foot, freezing the ground to smooth slippery ice. She laughs as she watches Hans slips with a surprise.


	6. Chapter 6

(Present)

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As a promise she couldn't avoid, Elsa arrives an hour before dinner. She ignores Anna (who was waiting at the gates with a large smile), goes straight to her room and changed her attire. Elsa sits on her bed with a sigh, running her hand through her strange hair. She replays the events of the spar. This time, Hans won by melting the ice into a deep warm puddle, which they both fell in with a surprise. With his ability, they were able to dry. After the spar, they talked. There was something bubbling in her chest. It has been bubbling lately when she is around this man. She couldn't name it. But she does know that Hans is the cause of this sensation. She planned to tell him. Elsa needed to release it before something unpredictable happens. But his talking was preventing Elsa to speak.

 _"If I was king, I would host a ball every three months. All my brothers will be invited_ — _of course, you too_ — _In fact, I would invite your entire_ — _"_

_She couldn't hold it any longer. "Hans!" She stopped her walking._

_He paused, holding his hands up as if he was surrendering. "Sorry, am I talking too much?" He asked with a sheepish smile._

_"No. No, not all," said Elsa. "I just want to tell you that_ — _that I_ — _" She took a deep breath. "I- I really like you. Very much. These feelings_ — _this feeling... I'm glad we're friends." She said this very quickly. She couldn't bring herself to say it. What she really meant. She hoped that Hans wouldn't feel disappointed. She's already disappointed with herself._

 _But he smiled. That damn desirable yet genuine smile. "I share the same mutual feelings, Elsa. Shall we continue our walk? I'm sure Frostbite is hungry. I'm sacrificing my sugar cubes for him._ "

Now sitting at the dining table, with Kristoff and Anna, she wonders what Hans meant by that. _I share the same mutual feelings_.

Doesn't he feel what she really feels? That... bubbling? Does Hans just like her? He doesn't seem to show any hints of affections or the slightest interest. Perhaps he just wants a friendship. Their unexpected friendship is great. Enjoyable. But, these past few months, spending time with each, Elsa realizes she wants more. And Hans doesn't. _Because he doesn't-_

"Elsa." Anna's voice interrupts her thoughts. Elsa scowls. _How rude. Do I interrupt her with her inane talks? How does her husband tolerate her?_ Her sister simply flickers her eyes to her hand and meets Elsa's eyes. In Elsa's hand is a fork, now covered in frost. Elsa shrugs and continues to poke at her steak. She wishes she could tell him. What if he doesn't feel what she feels... He has to! Their friendship is stronger... much more...

"Hey, Elsaaaa!" Anna sings.

 _Now what?_ Her scowl deepens."What?"

"Aren't you going to eat the steak? It's delicious! The cooks made it special for this dinner."

"I eat what I please," Elsa says.

"You should taste it." Anna persuade.

"Anna—"

"Just one bite. A big bite. And you don't have to eat all if you don't like it. But can you stay for dessert? We're having chocolate cake—"

If it would keep her mouth shut— "Fine." Elsa roughly cuts a piece of her steak and plop it in her mouth. She chews, prepares to criticize it harshly but... _it's deliciou_ s... and she swallows... _it's regretful_. The steak is dry. Thick. Momentarily, it stuffs her throat. Then it becomes hot. Burning and scarring. Elsa tries to clear her throat, then try to cough it out in an unqueen-ly manner, hitting her chest.

"Elsa?" Anna says, worry in her voice.

"Elsa, are you okay?" Kristoff asks, concern written across his face.

Elsa shakes her head. Tears spring from her eyes. She frantically reaches for her goblet and begins to drink in a manner that would make a perfect queen scold her. She slams her cup down. Rage fills her. "That was..."

"Good?" says Anna.

"Bad?" says Kristoff.

" _Disgusting_!" Elsa hisses. "If you call this delicious, I question your intellect. " This is directly said to Anna, whose face is quite red from embarrassment. "This will be the last dinner you'll have with me— _after_ to speak to the cooks who... who..." Her words falter as her face flushes with heat. Her head becomes fuzzy. Her vision begins to sway. Elsa could swear she saw Kristoff and Anna nod at each other before he speaks. "Elsa listen. We're going to take you to Grand Pappi."

Her words are slurred. " _Whaaat_?"

"We think there's something wrong, Elsa," Anna says standing.

In other words, they think it's something wrong with her. Insulted, Elsa stands. A sudden wave of dizziness hits her hard. She falls back into Kristoff's arms who had suddenly appeared behind her. She feels so weak. So tired and sleepy. Before she slipped into the darkness she hears Anna. "You were right, Kris. The potion worked fast. Now let's hurry before it gets too dark."

The last thought she has is a conclusion. _Hans doesn't love me._


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> suicide attempt in this chapter

(Present)

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She runs. Far from the trolls. Far from Anna and her lover. To the forest where her sanity is. She knows they are after her. Just a few minutes behind. It's enough time to get to the forest and end it all.

They had drugged her. Abducted her and took her to the place of the trolls. She woke up a bit flustered. She demanded answers, threatening to freeze anyone that comes in contact with her. In the process of yelling, Elsa found another patch of her white hair turning black. When common sense came to mind, she calmed, pretending to listen to the old troll's lecture, but really trying to control her anger. She allowed the old troll to touch her forehead, feeling a cooling sensation. Just for a spare moment, Elsa felt the love of the people she knows— Anna, Olaf, her kingdom— until that feeling weakens to nothingness then to coldness.

Grand Pappi sighed and talked to Anna and Kristoff. Their conversation was hushed, but Elsa did catch a few sentences.

_"—why she's becoming so cold. She's slowly freezing her own heart." Grand Pappi said._

_"That's okay, right?" Anna questioned. "We can thaw her heart with an act of true love. It worked for me."_

_"It worked for and only you, Anna. This is far different. Elsa has unknowingly cursed herself. She needs her heart shattered before it freezes. If it does, Elsa will be cold, empty—"_

That's when Elsa ran to her forest. The thought that she is freezing her own heart was overwhelming. Grand Pappi said she had cursed herself. How is that even possible? Does that explain the black hair?

Elsa takes one of the horses, that Kristoff and Anna used to bring her to the trolls. She forces the horse to move faster with a hard kick of her bare feet. It doesn't take her long to reach the Everlasting Winter Forest. Her siblings are minutes behind, so she has enough time. The horse skids to a stop at the first contact of snow on its hooves.

Elsa hurries off the horse, falling face-first in the snow. She scrambles up and begins to run. Tears create rivers down her cheeks. She runs until she gets to that familiar clearing and collapses on her knees. By now, her eyes refuse to produce any more tears. Elsa can feel the heaviness of her heart. She can now feel the ice wanting to flourish her heart. Why didn't she feel it before? Maybe she could have stopped the self-inflicted curse then.

It's far too late now. The only way to stop this is a shattered heart. But who will shatter the heart of the queen? And how? More importantly, why would anyone want to shatter Elsa's heart?

She can't ask Anna because her sister loves Elsa dearly to even think of hurting Elsa's feelings (That weak, feeble girl! She thought true love can stop this. Not everything is cured with true love!). She can't ask Kristoff because he sees her as a sister. In fact, they're siblings by law. Never mind any of the staff or servants. Despite her occasional sharp remarks and harsh threats, the kingdom loves Elsa too dearly— which disgusts her— to shatter her iced heart. Even if her life is at stake.

Hans—

No. She can't bring herself to ask him. Or even tell him what's going on.

Elsa decides she can no longer wait for some random person to shatter her heart, nor can she wait until she is a frozen statue or a cold, empty queen. Thinking of this reminds her of when Anna was an ice statue. Oh, why did it take an act of true love to break the curse for Anna, but would not for Elsa? She has to end it now or make time quicker. And after, she'll go back to her kingdom, make everything cold and frozen—

She sobs as she waves her hands an inch above the ground. With her powers, Elsa creates a dagger of ice. It isn't just an ice 'ice dagger'. It's an enchanted dagger. Anything that is impaled by it will freeze in a short period of time. Elsa grabs the dagger with both hands. She points it to her chest. Right before she is ready, a voice yells her name. "Elsa!"

Elsa turns her head. Hans stands there, mouth agape, hand stretch out. His expression is confused but more frightened. He takes on step towards her. "Put down the knife! Please!"

Elsa feels hot tears pricking her eyes. He shouldn't be here. How did he get here so fast? Doesn't matter anymore. "I can't wait," she says. Then impale the dagger in her chest.


End file.
